I truly feel as if I am stuck in a huge hole of quick sand and it's taking me down fast.
Please don't get me wrong! I am truly grateful to our Blessed Lord above for all the great things in my life! And I do have many!
The people that do not understand this disease think that we are just being ungrateful and that is simply not the case!! My husband is included in this group. He just dosen't get it!! Sometimes he does try but not often. He thinks that the nice weather coming and some exercise will make it all go away. True it may help, but it won't make it go away. Believe me, every spring I hope it will work, but it never does. The exercise thing doesn't either.
I am just sooooooo tired of feeling this way!! Our financial situation is killing me!!
The first of the month is tomorrow so the rent is due. I have NO idea where that is coming from!!
My electric is due to be shut off if I don't pay the back balance by Friday! We are expecting a check so that will help but not much. I think I can work out a payment arrangement for the electric. I still have yet to figure out a way to pay the car payment. Maybe I'll see if I can borrow it...from who I have no idea! Our whole family is basically in no position for lending.
BUT... I put it in the Lord's hands, so it WILL all work out, somehow. I just need to do it on my own because I just don't feel like dealing with hubby. I am better off working this through myself!!
I just want to end this with some praise to GOD above for getting me through my rough spots. I also ask him to please heal my mind and give me some peace. I can do so much more for him and so many others if had a better mindset!!
Amen
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