Am I going crazy? Am I going insane and dazed?

[Am I Going Crazy by KoRn]


I certainly feel this way. I feel like I am being pulled in a thousand different directions!!!

I have an interview this afternoon for a job. Now, while I am excited & happy about the prospect of getting back into the work force & earning much needed money, I am not looking forward to the hours involved!! My hours will be Wed. & Thurs. 1pm - 10pm, Fri. 1pm - 9pm & Sat. 7am - 9pm...yes, that IS a 14 hour day!!

If I am hired, I first have to go through a 2 week orientation/training period...paid, of course. But the hours for these days are 8-4, with a couple days actually working @ the home I will be placed, which means odd hours. This 8-4 schedule is going to cause some problems w/ school drop off for both Shea & Nick AND pick up for Shea, as well as having to find someone to watch her in the afternoons.

When I do start, I can take her & pick her up. But will have to find a sitter Wed. -Fri. for the afternoons. As well as, on Saturdays if hubby has to work.
I know everything will work out, but it just so stressful worrying about it!!

Add in the fact that other than her 2½ hours in school, Shea is used to having me home with her!! This will be stressful for her AND me. It kills me to have to leave her for that period of time...as well as wondering if she is ok, etc. I know we will all adjust, but it is just so stressful to even think about!!

I am also hoping that me going back to work and taking some of the financial burden off of the king will help our situation!! Things are NOT good right now between us. It has gotten a little better since we had a talk and due to an incident, but we are far off from being OK!!

I just feel so weighed down right now, I could literally sit and cry while typing this!!

Of course, my lack of sleep doesn't help either. I just do not sleep well at night!! I may sleep for a couple hours but then I am up tossing and turning. It's awful...I am always soooooo tired!!

I am just going to put it all into HIS hands and let it happen as it will!

Praying is the only thing that keeps me sane anymore!

I am so blessed to be graced by what the LORD gives me!!



^JUST ^j^ BELIEVE^